Letters to the CIA – 15th April 2018

I have just set up a new blog, Letters to the CIA, which is inspired by C S Lewis’s The Screwtape Letters, in which he published his correspondence with the Devil. Here’s the first one:

Guys, I’m most terribly sorry that I didn’t post yesterday and also that my phone had turned itself off. You must have been worried out of your minds, wondering what I was up to!

The truth is, with all the lovely spring weather, I did rather overdo it in the garden on Friday and so yesterday my back was complaining every time I sat down to type.

Otherwise, I’m fine and thriving and the new book, Stories in the Stars, is going well – incredibly well, in fact. I’m getting so much inspiration in writing it that sometimes it seems like there is a ton of information raining down on me, at times almost more than I can handle, but I’m sure you know what that’s like.

Anyway, I have a nice surprise for you! You may have heard of a very good book called The Screwtape Letters by C S Lewis? It is in effect a collation of letters that he wrote to the Devil. So taking my inspiration from that, I have decided to write to you, regularly, to liven up your work because I’m sure it must be dreadfully boring having to stare at people’s cats and dinners all day long.

Like Lewis and the Devil, I can also give you updates on how you’re doing with your psy-ops campaigns in trying to persuade us that right is wrong, and wrong is right. That Flat Earth “theory”, by the way, was a humdinger and I still pass people on Glastonbury High Street arguing that one through. In fact, I think you’ve done brilliantly in giving us so many things to disagree with each other about while pricking people’s vanities so that they end up seeing themselves as authorities in subject areas that they know absolutely nothing about. So well done with all that!

I know you may be feeling a little vulnerable right now with Zuckerberg getting a good grilling from that Congress committee, last week, but please don’t worry. All of those interrogating him had had their palms thickly greased and it was really just a show trial to try to make people believe that something is being done. Of course, nothing will be done … well, not right now anyway, but there are a few storm clouds on the horizon because President Trump is going to change how the whole internet is regulated and I’m afraid it will put a stop to your favourite sport of censoring conservatives.

However, that’s all a long way in the future, so for now, please do enjoy your Sunday and I’ll write again soon.

All best wishes,


PS If you’d like to be notified whenever I write a new one, please subscribe to my new blog Letters to the CIA.

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